


Guide This One

by DragonDreads (cjbage)



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Adult Content, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mature Situations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-19
Updated: 2016-08-19
Packaged: 2018-08-09 17:43:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7811224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cjbage/pseuds/DragonDreads
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The sea claimed him. The one he longed for waited for him on the shore. After so many years they were now reunited, but something seemed wrong, something felt different inside him as he looked into her sunset-colored eyes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There have been some of the Shrios shippers that had wondered what could have happened concerning Thane and Irikah when he died. If Irikah waited for Thane on the shore what would her reaction be to Thane falling in love with another woman, and promising to wait for her to reunite on the other side?
> 
> This story is just one possibility that entered my mind.
> 
> I did not have a beta-reader at the time of original posting. It may be updated later with improved grammar, punctuation, and spelling.
> 
> **~**
> 
> Standard Disclaimer: Bioware owns all of the Mass Effect Universe, including but not limited to the recognizable characters. Any original characters are my own. There is no monetary gain from this work. All I am doing is playing around with their universe.
> 
> **~**
> 
>  
> 
> **\------ If you are reading this on any site other than Archiveofourown.org, please know that this is a STOLEN WORK, the author has NOT given permission for it to be here. If you're paying to read it, you're being cheated, because you can read it for FREE on that site! See Author's Notes for translation exceptions.------**

* * *

 

 

Their relationship started with just sitting and talking. It grew ever stronger as the missions and threat of the beings known as Collectors continued. The fights and the long talks afterward of his religion, of being raised by the hanar from a child to become the galaxy’s greatest assassin, finally led to the inevitable.

Thane Krios, a drell master assassin, was notified that his young adult son had somehow obtained a box containing clues to Thane’s past. Something that Thane now realized was a mistake to have made and left for his son, Kolyat, to receive upon Thane’s impending death.

He turned to the one person that he thought he could ask for help. He didn’t need her help, but he did want it. He wanted it because he was afraid he would once again mess up with what remained of his family. He was afraid he would lose his son to entropy. He turned to Commander Shepard.

When she walked into the room, after receiving the request he had left with the Yeoman, his throat went dry. He realized this was going to be harder than he had originally thought.

His large dark eyes scanned her alien body. Noticing the tiny scars that criss crossed her face and neck. They were healing but still the orange glow caused by the cybernetics and various weaves that were under her skin sometimes caught the light and were visible.

He had fought with his growing attraction to this human female. His memories of his dead wife were brought up more and more to try and stop the feelings and desires that he was experiencing each time Shepard entered the small Life Support room that he called his temporary home. Her scent filled the small chamber quickly and his memories would dissolve and change into ones of her.

 

* * *

 

He waited until she approached him, a slight grin marred his handsome green scaled face when she immediately assumed it was his illness, the Kepral’s Syndrome he had dealt with for many years, that was the cause of the request for her to join him.

“No Shepard, it is not my illness. This is much harder to put into words, now that you are here.”

Shepard leaned against the wall of the cabin and told him to take his time. Her eyes wandered over him, and her brows drew in a slight frown at just how nervous the normally outwardly calm drell was.

It was just a matter of a few short minutes later when he had told her his entire story. His wife murdered because of his carelessness and hubris. His son given into the care of family members as Thane fell into a battle sleep and went to hunt her killers. He was just a small child then. Thane’s vendetta had taken him so long that his son was practically a full grown man when he finished tracking and killing the last member of the ones responsible for Irikah’s death.

By then it was too late. The time had long since gone when he could have had a hand in the way his son was raised. The hate and fear that his aunt and uncle had of Thane and what led to the death of his wife had been instilled in young Kolyat. The sense of abandonment was also there.

Now Kolyat had taken on a job as a hitman. He was not compact trained, Irikah would not allow it. He was disconnected. Thane explained all this to Shepard and she listened then asked a few short questions. A moment later she called out for Joker to set an immediate course for the Citadel.

 

* * *

 

Entropy didn’t win this time, thanks to the Commander. Thane did not lose his son to it. Kolyat may be mad at him, may even go so far as to hate him. Now he knew the real reason Thane had left. The real reason that his mother had died.

“Thane? Did you want to go with me to take care of Garrus’ task or would you like to return to the ship and rest? Meditate?”

“I do appreciate your concern and would like to meditate on everything that had happened. This will take some time to sort and understand.”

“Of course. If you wouldn’t mind, let Mordin know to join us here at C-Sec when you return the Normandy please.”

Thane gave her a short bow, filled with the respect and maybe a bit of something else, then turned and left.

 

* * *

 

Several hours had passed and Thane came out of the memories he was reliving when the slight shudder signalling the Normandy was leaving dock was felt under his feet. He knew within a few moments of safely exiting the mass relay she would leave the bridge and head for his room.

It had been the same with every crew member’s personal requests of her.

He had settled into his chair that faced the window into the drive core room and waited.

“Thane? Do you have a few minutes?” Her voice came to him, a bit hesitant as if she didn’t want to intrude on his meditations.

He turned his head slightly and indicated the chair. “Of course, Shepard. I wish to thank you for the help you provided me and also to Kolyat, even though he may not know it was the same woman who punched him that saved him from being charged as a criminal.”

One slender hand with elegantly long fingers waved away his thanks. “I am just glad we made it in time, and I was able to help. Have you spoken to him?”

“I have …,” he blinked as he looked down at his linked fingers. “This is something that will take time, Siha. And time is not something I have much of these days.”

He heard a slight exhalation of breath and glanced back up at her. She was staring at him with those unfathomable eyes of hers. A blue so bright and clear they reminded him of the oceans of Kahje. When the seas were calm and on the very rare occurrence that the sun actually showed through the cloud cover. The way the water turned crystalline blue and shimmered. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from her and she reached up to her translator implant and gently touched it.

“I think my translator glitched. What did you just call me?”

A slow smile tilted the one corner of his mouth, and he leaned slightly forward in his chair.

“I called you Siha. Maybe one day I shall explain what that is."  She graced him with one of her very rare smiles and it stunned him. His heart sped up and his body stirred. “So the memories that sometimes slip out when we are talking. The one with the sunset colored eyes, that was your wife?”

The smile slid off his face as he took in a raspy, shallow breath. She deserved answers to questions that she may have and set about answering them. He realized for the first time he had someone to talk to about his deceased wife, his family and what happened and told her so.

“You’re the first friend I’ve had in… in ten years, Shepard.”

She stood from her chair and placed her hand on his shoulder for the briefest of moments in comfort. He wanted more. He wanted her hand on him without the barriers of her gloves and his coat.

He blinked.

“You’ve been alone for a long time, Thane.”

He let out a quiet snort. “Books fulfilled me. Work fulfilled me. Until now. Thank you, Shepard.”

She gave a gentle squeeze before letting go of his shoulder. She just looked at him, their eyes locked together and he saw her swallow nervously.

“A friend, huh? Well, I suppose that’s a start.”

He blinked again and gave a very slight start. So slight that she hadn’t even noticed it.

“A ….start?” His mind worked furiously as he tried to decide if she had been flirting with him or if it only meant that they could become better friends. Share a close camaraderie, like she did with her turian sniper, Garrus. He folded his hands and leaned his elbows on the table. A few seconds later he tipped his head toward her and smiled, then hoped for what he really wanted when he said to her. “That’s … intriguing.”

 

* * *

 

Days turned into weeks as she continued to come to the Life Support room as often as she could. Each time they would lean toward each other and hold hands.

At first, it was awkward. Shepard would sit in the chair and immediately remove her gloves, and he would strip off his half mitts.  Her five fingers shifted slightly to accommodate his four. The fused fingers much wider than the others. They made it work, and now it was second nature. Normal.

He relished the feeling of her skin against his scales. He wondered if the rest of her would feel the same or if there would be a large difference because of the callouses on her hands that came with the job. One day soon he hoped to find out.

She was looking tired and stressed. Her time spent in his room seemed to have shortened as more demands were placed on her. Several times he watched as her eyelids drooped and she would slowly nod off, only to jerk awake seconds later. One of those times he had convinced her to lay down on his cot. That for just a few minutes to rest and he would make sure she was safe and protected. To let him take care of her for those few precious moments. She smiled tiredly and said only if he joined her. They settled on his narrow cot and he held her tightly and she slept safely in the arms of an assassin.

He had been awakened by a touch so featherlight he thought he had imagined it. He had been reliving a memory of Irikah, one of the few happy ones he had.

For days after his relationship with Shepard had begun he searched his memory, his perfect drell memory, for each one when he and Irikah were together and she had smiled. He had frowned. He had so very few. He loved Irikah, she woke him from his battle sleep. Why then had he so many more memories with Shepard in the short time he had known her than the years he had been married to his wife?

His eyes opened immediately, and he was ashamed that he had been reliving a memory with a woman other than the one that held him cradled in her arms.

“Shepard, I…”

Her fingertip touched his smooth, cool lips. “Hush. It is alright. I do understand. She was your wife, the mother of your son.”

He blinked back the moisture that had started to pool in his eyes and held her to him tighter. She stroked his head and pretended not to feel the few tears he shed soak through her uniform.

After that one time he forced himself to stop searching his memories when he knew Shepard was coming to visit him. It felt wrong, it was a grave disservice he was doing to her. To them both.

 

* * *

 

She had felt the change in him. The way her eyes would search his and slowly she understood that he was finally ready to commit to a true relationship and see just where it led. She hadn’t been able to call it love. Not when he seemed more focused on memories of the past than ones made with her. Now though, now it was different.

They had been training and had left the ship unguarded. They had been secure in their knowledge that they were safe from the Collectors. How could they find the ship in the middle of the whole damn galaxy?

By laying a trap with the IFF module that was needed by the Normandy to traverse the Omega-4 relay. Now all the ship crew, save for Joker, had been taken and they were on the way to get them back.

She looked up as the door to her cabin opened, and Thane walked in. Nervous and upset.

He was scared. He was afraid of losing her, of losing his son again. It left him feeling cold in the pit of his stomach when he thought about it. He had trained and meditated so hard to calm himself, to prepare himself.

Shepard let him talk, let him pace and when she couldn’t stand to see him in such pain any longer, she turned his head toward her. His tear-filled eyes found hers and she stroked the side of his scaled head. Her fingertips danced over the stiff ridges.

“Shh. We are here. We are together and we are alive. In this moment of time. In this place. We are alive.” She whispered to him then gently kissed him as her thumbs wiped away the tears.

He felt a bolt of electricity go through his body where her soft lips met his. When the kiss ended, he opened his eyes and looked into hers. “Siha, my warrior angel.”

She gave him a soft smile then stroked his face again before his own hand reached to touch her. His nervousness fled as she leaned into his touch and accepted his kisses.

He had never felt something so right. Never had he been as sated and at ease as he now felt as he laid in Shepard’s bed, her warm smooth skinned body curled around his scaled one. His shallow breaths stirred her hair and she smiled as she snuggled closer, her hand caressing his well muscled, bare chest. It was more than he had ever hoped for. Making love with her made him truly feel alive again.

He shifted and rolled as her hand moved to his waist then his hip and came to rest on his member. Her fingers finding just the right spots and rhythm to bring him to full erection in seconds. This time wasn’t filled with hesitancy as they learned the difference in each other’s bodies. This time was filled with desire and need. At times rough, other times so sweetly gentle.

She never flinched or tensed when his hand closed around her throat and his eyes stared into hers. She met him thrust for thrust. No marks, no bruises. No gasping, no frightened looks. She trusted and accepted him as he was. Knowing that he could kill her in their passion, but filled with trust that he wouldn’t. His lips met hers and he whispered words of bewilderment that she had trusted him that much. Shown him how deep the trust she had for him ran.

He gave her everything that was in him. Brought her body to climax over and over.

He returned her trust in him by allowing her to touch and use his body as she had wanted to bring her even more pleasure. He had received just as much as from it as she had and it had startled him.

She used her hands and mouth, teeth and tongue on him in ways that Irikah would never have. His mind stopped and he pushed her from it. She had no place in his thoughts as he was moving deep in Shepard and listened to her cries of his name as he once more played her body and caused her to shatter around him.

She showed him how to do the same to her, what brought her so much pleasure that she arched so high off the bed and screamed out his name in ecstasy. Never would he have attempted to do these things before.

His shout of release was loud in the room, and it had embarrassed him. Until he saw the wicked grin on Shepard's face, that showed she was inordinately pleased with herself to have brought the galaxy’s most famous assassin to such an earth shattering climax.

 

* * *

 

Their crew had been rescued and they succeeded in destroying the Collectors. Their ship limped into Omega to start repairs. Many of the ground crew collected their wages and after their farewells departed the ship. They had grown close as they worked together but their mission was over and it was time they moved on.

Thane and Shepard were in her cabin, thoroughly celebrating their victory and most importantly their survival, when she received notice of an incoming private call from Admiral Hackett.

After the call ended Shepard gave the coordinates to Joker before she told Thane what was going on. He was furious when she was adamant about going there alone. He offered to go with her, after all he had more experience with this sort of thing that she did.

Her eyebrow slowly raised, and he shrugged at her. “It is stealth that is needed, my love. Not charge in and destroy everything.”

She told him she had her orders and would not go against them. He let out a sigh and told her he would need to meditate to work through his frustration at her obstinance and would be in the Life Support room.

He was careful not to show outward panic when EDI informed him that Shepard was no longer on the ship. She told him they had no contact with her for two days now and Joker was becoming worried. She had apologized and explained that Shepard had ordered them not to tell him she was leaving so he wouldn’t try and sneak onto her shuttle. He had no choice but to wait. He paced and he tried to meditate. His memories kept intruding. Their nights together, so very few of those. Of Kolyat and the last correspondence that they had shared. He was surprised and a bit worried when the usual feelings he had upon reliving a memory with Irikah weren’t as strong. He put his confusion aside when Joker’s panicked voice was heard yelling to braced themselves that this could get dicey.

Not even a few minutes later Shepard had come into the cabin and after taking several steps into the room, fell into a dead faint at his feet.

 

* * *

 

Thane and Garrus stood outside of the med bay window and watched as the older man wearing the dress blues of the Systems Alliance Navy handed Shepard a datapad and her eyes dropped to read it. She eased herself off of the gurney and stood at attention while saluting. The man had returned her salute and turned to walk out. The human male didn’t see Shepard slump and almost fall. If Doctor Chakwas hadn’t caught her she would have landed on the floor.

The remaining crew gathered together, and she told them that the Alliance had issued a warrant for her arrest. She was to report immediately to Arcturus Station and turn herself in for a trial.

She was going to make one quick stop off at the Citadel. All of her crew was to disembark. They were to leave the Normandy. Every man, every woman, was to scatter at the port and blend in. No one was to remain.

Joker crossed his arms and disobeyed a direct order as did Doctor Chakwas. Garrus and Tali argued then relented. Thane refused, quite vocally.

That night he felt himself starting to drift into battle sleep again when he thought of being away from her for the rest of their limited time.

They made love from the time Joker input the coordinates for the Citadel until it was time for the crew to leave. He had used a soft, silken rope to tie her that night. Her body open to him to use in whatever way he had wanted. A gift to him. A gift of memories to sustain him. When he had his fill, his hands shook as he loosened the bindings. His lips and fingers caressing every square inch that had been held by the rope. He was tender and gentle as he cared for her.

She kissed him deeply then held the side of his head. A question in her eyes that had worried him before she lent voice to it.

“What we did tonight, it was extraordinary. Never had I thought I could receive such pleasure.”

His fears eased, and he slowly smirked. “I am glad several of my skills have been put to better use, Siha. I, too, have never felt such overwhelming pleasure and the trust you have shown me is something I never thought anyone would be capable of.”

Her hands once more moved over the ridges along the sides of his face. “Surely Irikah had been on the receiving end of such talents. That and many more. I am hoping that we shall have more time. That the Alliance is just doing this for show and I will be released in a few days.”

He held her hands to his mouth and kissed her knuckles before focusing on her eyes. “Shepard, listen to me and believe. Never had I been with Irikah in such a way as we have. Never had we used breath play or bondage. Never would she have accepted my mouth giving her pleasure nor using hers on me. I was always careful. Always gentle.”

  
He let out a sigh and stood up from the bed. “Irikah would shy away if I became… enthusiastic. She had viewed sex as only a means for procreation. She had been utterly shocked when I had focused on bringing her to arousal and climax. She allowed it, but she had been shamed by it. In return, I had felt ashamed.” He picked up a robe that laid on the floor by his feet and shrugged into it.

When Shepard touched his arm, he looked over at her and saw the concern in her eyes. He gave a smile. “Being with you is different. I feel so alive and accepted. Thank you, Siha.”

 

* * *

 

Six months. It had been six months with no word from Thane or anyone else. She had written message after message. They were deleted from the message server without being sent. She confronted her guard and the burly Marine looked down and shrugged. He had mumbled that there was nothing he could do. He would be court-martialed for disobeying the commands of the Alliance Board if he tried to sneak messages to or from her.

One day later the Reapers attacked, and Earth burned.

She rescued one of her old teammates then headed to rescue another. They were appalled and worried when they saw Palaven also burning.

The ship had just pulled into the Citadel dock when her terminal lit up signalling a message was received. She almost deleted it when she didn’t recognize the name. Then she shrugged and opened it anyway. Less than five seconds later she was running for the lift. She had to get to Huerta Memorial Hospital. Thane was waiting for her.

Their reunion was hesitant and bittersweet. Thane's body was failing rapidly now. He was unable to leave the hospital. He was nervous when he asked about the soldier that was brought in earlier. She told him the story of what happened on Mars, and he said he would watch over them.

He looked down as their hands continued to move over each other. He was afraid to ask the question. He was afraid to find out if his Siha still cared for him as she once had.

Her kiss answered it for him.

Their one shared night in the uncomfortable hospital bed left him with a few new memories as she dressed early the next morning. His worry about not being able to please her had been pushed aside.

They had made love in many different ways before. He just had to find one that worked for them this time because of his body’s inability to maintain an erection. And if the muffled cries and groans as she climaxed time and again were any indication he had succeeded. Her touches and kisses brought him pleasure. Knowing that she was alive and loved him was enough to sustain him.

Her last kiss goodbye brought a tear to both their eyes as she turned and hurried from the room.

A week later Cerberus attacked the Citadel. Thane was critically injured while he fought to keep a reaper tech-enhanced assassin from killing the Salarian Councilor.

Shepard’s heart tore as she watched the man she loved crumple to the ground and had no choice but to leave him to save the rest of the ungrateful Council.

The C-Sec Commander radioed her letting her know that Thane was barely alive and was transported to Huerta and she should hurry.

She raced down the crowded hallway looking for anyone that may know of where he had been taken. She finally found a doctor who gave her the information. He told her about the seriousness of the injury. He told her about the surgery. Then he told her about the unlikelihood of Mr. Nuara … Mr. Krios surviving for much longer.

She steeled herself to enter the room. Her eyes went wide when she saw the back of another drell who was standing near the window. He turned, and she gave a nod to him. He reminded her of who he was then moved closer to the bed. Kolyat whispered that Thane had insisted the mask be removed so he could be… comfortable.

Shepard’s lips quivered. She would not break down in front of the two men. She would not give into her grief at the impending loss of her love.

She leaned down and whispered to him. Telling him how much she loved him. His eyes slowly opened, and he gave a small grin to her. They spoke only a few seconds before he started to pray and had to stop because of the pain and coughs that were wracking his body.

Shepard blinked as Kolyat finished the prayer for him.

The young blue drell moved to the other side of the bed and held out a small black book of prayer when Thane had asked him to say the final one.

“Would you like to join me?” Kolyat’s gravelly voice came out sounding even more cracked and broken than hers did. She gave a nod and took Thane’s hand in her own, and they started to read the prayer.

 

_“Kalahira, this one's heart is pure,_

_but beset by wickedness and contention._

_Guide this one to where the traveler never tires,_

_the lover never leaves, the hungry never starve._

_Guide this one, Kalahira,_

_and she will be a companion to you as she was to me.”_

 

Halfway through their prayer, Thane turned his head to look out the window at the artificial sky of the Citadel. He let out one last sighing breath as the cool waves of the ocean washed over him and he surfaced on the white sand beaches of Kalahira’s shore.


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

 

Thane looked around for a few quick moments before he noticed the figure as they slowly made their way toward him.

He waited. The figure was familiar. One he had only seen in his memories for so many years.

Irikah.

He ran toward his wife. To be reunited with the woman who had awoken him from battle sleep so long ago and gave him a son.

When he drew closer, he fell to knees and started asking for forgiveness for failing her and letting her die.

“Stand, Thane. Our destinies are prewritten in the stars. What came to pass was already determined.”

He shakily stood, and his eyes moved over her hungrily. She took a step back, and he stiffened. He had… forgotten.

“I beg your forgiveness once again, my wife.”

Her sunset colored eyes stared at him for a moment before her head tipped. Thane gently touched her face, the smaller ridges that the females of their species had.

“I have missed you, Irikah.” His lips met hers and instead of feeling the overwhelming desire for her that should have accompanied their long awaited reunion, he felt...barely a hint of need or want. His body wasn’t aroused. His heart rate stayed a calm, steady beat. The lips beneath his held no welcoming heat nor did a moist insistent tongue lick at his own lips demanding entrance.

He pulled away from her and looked down into those eyes that once woke him and had haunted him in her death. His mind and heart told him they were the wrong color. They weren’t blue.

The scales under his palm as he cupped her ribbed cheek felt off. His body only wants to remember the silky smooth skin of his human lover. Of his Siha. Of Commander Shepard.

He took a step back.

“What is wrong, husband?”

He frowned again and shook his head. She stepped forward and placed a hand on his chest. “Come, let me take you to the temple where you may meditate. Your mind may clear then.”

He followed her back along the beach. His mind was elsewhere and not paying attention to what Irikah had been saying to him. She was talking about the temple and how life there was beautiful. So well ordered and peaceful. How her small room was just perfect, just what she had always wanted.

“I have prepared a small room across the hall from mine that you may stay in, Thane. The life you will lead at the temple will be calm and without the need for violence. It is the life we should have led, to begin with. Not one filled with guns and blood. Just with our hearts given to Arashu in praise. Arashu knows I had been unable to get you to change your ways when we were alive. On this side of the shore, you have no need for it. No need even to think about it.”

Thane frowned slightly. He had been a weapon since his training began at age 5. It was what he knew. What he was trained for. Shepard had accepted that part of him as something that made him who he was. Why couldn’t his wife?

“I think the first thing you should do after your ritual bath is to pray and ask for forgiveness in fornicating with the human. You knew there could be no children of such a union. Coitus is for the creation of children. I have explained this to you before. I allowed myself to be debased by you so that a child could be produced. You must seek redemption in the Goddess’ eyes for such an egregious act.”

Thane swallowed. Irikah knew he had been having intercourse with Shepard and also knew that he had greatly enjoyed it. His eyes dropped. Why should he ask for forgiveness? There was nothing in the teachings about not finding pleasure in your partner. Nothing that explicitly states sex to make children only, in the doctrine. It was something that Irikah had demanded, and he had acquiesced to.

He said not a word as he followed her into the temple.

The room was even more sparse than the Life support room. At least there he had a cot, a table, and chairs. Here there was a pallet on the floor. A small, simple pillow and a shrine that seemed to take up an entire wall.

“This is your room. Beautiful isn’t it. I chose this place for you because of the shrine. Seeing the shrine when you awaken will invoke prayers. Follow me to the bathing room.”

She showed him the entrance to the males bathing area that was on the far side of the temple than where the females bath was.

“Goodbye, Thane. I shall see you at evening prayer.” She turned her cheek toward him, and he placed the obligatory kiss there.

By Arashu what had happened to him? Why was he having the thoughts that he was? Where was the kind-hearted and courageous woman that had caused him to fall to his knees and ask for her forgiveness? Then ask for marriage. The woman that was walking away from him… was that really Irikah?

He sighed and then headed inside of the bathing room to scour away the remaining beach sand from his scales. When he was done, he went back to his room to pray. Only his thoughts were too filled with Shepard, and he was worried about what was happening on the other side of the shore to really pray in earnest for forgiveness for enjoying his encounters with Shepard.

 

* * *

 

 

Thane had lost all sense of time on this side of the shore. It was different here than in the world of the living. His days consisted of prayer, a light meal, prayer, followed by hours of mediation and prayer. Finally a light meal and then prayer before sleeping.

The meals, of course, were unnecessary but they helped to bring order to his day. He had been surprised the next morning by a meal appearing by the small door to his room after his morning prayer had ended. He had spoken to no one about it. Only thought of using the food to measure the passing of time.

He had yet to make love to his wife, and she seemed in no hurry to visit him in his room. The one time that he had tried to join her, she reminded him this was a temple, a holy place and his impure thoughts and needs had no place there.

He gave her a bow, apologized then left.

He had taken to walking along the beach. Stopping to help several drell that had washed up on the shores. So many… was it because of the war? He had begun asking for news. Hoping to hear a tidbit or two about Shepard, about his son.

One drell told him about almost losing Kahje to an indoctrinated Hanar.

Another told him that Thessia had been lost as he helped his bewildered asari wife to stand after she had stumbled on the beach.

He looked out over the ocean and sent a prayer to both Arashu and Kalahira to watch over his Siha and to help her in the trials she was facing. For the first time since arriving, he felt a slight weight lift from his shoulders after this prayer was sent.

 

* * *

 

 

Days bled together as he helped more and more drell. He heard a snippet about his beloved Shepard; she was still alive and fighting. She had brought peace to the geth and quarians and had gained both of their support in the war.

He was on the beach yet again, staring off into the water and waiting to see if another soul would come to the shore and offer him a word about Shepard and the war.

It was only his years and years of training that kept him from flinching and reacting when a soft female voice came from beside him.

“You seem troubled. This is a place where troubles are forgotten, even for we drell. Where the life you lead is one of your choosing and one that is fulfilling to you.”

Thane didn’t say anything for a moment. He didn’t even look her way before he gave a short bow. “I am concerned about what has happened to someone… special to me. I feel like I had failed her in dying when I did and letting her face the war alone, without me to lean on and help to at least remove some of the burdens from her shoulders.”

“Ahh. I see. Are you not married though? To a female, that is on this side of the ocean? Why are you not with her? Why are you standing here alone and why is she is not beside you during this time?”

He glanced at the female drell who was draped in a blindingly white robe and gasped before dropping to his knees.

“I beg your forgiveness, Lady Arashu.”

He flinched when she started laughing. “Oh get up and stop the bowing. Now answer my questions.”

He shakily stood and cleared his throat. “I am indeed married to a beautiful woman who is on this side of the ocean. She is very devoted to you. Her prayers and meditation are very important, and I do not wish to disturb her just to bring her to the ocean for me to stand here while my memories and thoughts are with another.”

The female stared at him for the longest time. Unmoving and unblinking. “Uh huh. Now, what is the real reason?”

Thane blinked. Arashu sounded just like Shepard did when he tried to evade her questions about his injuries.

“I-I…”

“Spit it out," she told him as one of her brow ridges rose.

“I love Shepard. I loved being with her. I loved fighting beside her. I loved the way she accepted all of me. My flaws, my history, my desires and needs. She brought me such pleasure and not just of the body. She freed me.” He dropped his eyes and bowed again.

“I see. And you do not feel this way about your wife?”

She walked closer to the sea and dipped her hand in the cool, clear water.

“I care very deeply for my wife. Irikah had given me a son. He was the only good thing that I had helped to bring into the galaxy.”

She gave a hum. “You brought more than just that one ray of brightness.”

She stood and moved to stand in front of him. Her eyes were boring into his own.

“You have been a faithful follower. I have heard your prayers and wishes. I shall do this one thing for you, a boon you may say. For a few brief moments, I shall open a link between this realm and the one of the living. You may see your Siha, talk to her. But you will be unable to touch her. She will hear you, sense you. But will be unable to touch or see you. Once and only once will I do this for you. Use the time wisely.”

Thane stood up straight, and his heartbeat thundered in his chest. “I give you my thanks, Lady Arashu.”

“Hmm,  don’t thank me yet. There is one more condition. Shepard will be allowed to come here upon her death if that is the wish of her heart, but you will need to make a choice. At the time when she's pulled from the water, you must choose between staying at the temple and being known as husband to Irikah. Or choosing Shepard and wandering this land until you find what it is that you both seek. You will not be allowed both. Think well in the time you have. For once the choice has been made it can not be changed.”

“I… I understand.” His brow drew down as he thought about what was being asked of him in exchange for a brief glimpse of Shepard.

“What do you choose? Shall I open the link or do you wish to continue as you have been and it will be like this conversation never happened.”

He closed his eyes briefly. “Open the link, Lady Arashu.”

He saw flashes of a party, of the crew speed by him then he saw only her. She was standing at the railing which overlooked the docked Normandy. He smiled as he scanned the ship that he had called home for a brief time in his life then he quickly approached her.

Shepard took a breath then closed her eyes. She felt… Thane.

“I am glad you found time to celebrate, Siha.” His voice sounded next to her ear, just a whisper but it was enough.

“I wish you were there with me, Thane. I miss you so much.”

“And I you, Siha. Know this; I am with you always, and I would never trade a moment of the time we spent together. You brought me to back to life, Shepard.”

She gave a small laugh.

“It was a good fight,” he whispered to her. Moving as close as he possibly could and wishing with all his heart he could enfold her in his arms and lift the burden that weighed down upon her.

“Yes, the best fight.”

“Now finish it, Siha. Remember this. When you go to the sea, I shall be there waiting for you on the shore if it is the deepest wish of your heart to be reunited with me. I love you, Shepard.”

“And I love you, Thane,” her whispered words no sooner came to him then the link was closed.


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

 

He continued to return to the shore, day after day. He walked the length of the beach. His eyes were constantly searching for any sign of Shepard.

He stopped for a moment and dropped his head as if in prayer. He wondered if she was alive or if she had not wanted to be with him any longer.

“So this is where you come to every day, instead of spending it in prayer.”

He turned to Irikah as she approached him.

“I come here to help others who had just arrived on the shore. I pray and I think.”

“Think about what?” Irikah stopped and looked around the deserted beach.

“I reflect on my life before I arrived on the shore. I watch memories of my childhood. The one where I first saw you in my scope as I lined up my shot. I remembered how I felt when I heard that Kolyat had been born when I was away for work.”

Irikah let out a snort. “Work. You were always away for work.”

“That is very true.” He turned back toward the water. “I think of my time with Shepard. Of helping to rid the galaxy of the Collector threat. Of stopping the assassin from reaching his goal. I think of how she must have felt when I left her to go to the sea. I wonder how she is coping during the war.”

“Still thinking of that human?”

“Yes. She is a Siha of great power. She is fighting a battle of epic proportions and has only a few people left that she can now count on.”

His brows furrowed as he heard a slight huff.

“I also remember our nights together and our days. I remember the way she made me feel, the way she embraced me and spent so many months getting to know me before she made her intentions known. I remember how she never flinched at my touch but welcomed it, then would grin and demand more. I remember her saving our son from becoming disconnected or worse… dead.”

He knelt beside the water. “I stand here, day after day, waiting, watching and remembering.”

He looked up as he felt another presence beside him and heard a gasp from Irikah.

“Hello, Thane.”

He stood and gave the Goddess a slight smile. “Hello to you as well, Lady Arashu.”

Another gasp sounded from the other side of him; this one sounded of outrage rather than surprise. “How dare you speak to the revered Goddess that way, as if she was some woman you pass on the street. Show respect.”

“Uh-huh. How about if you keep your little sanctimonious outbursts to yourself, Irikah Krios.” Arashu said to the flabbergasted female causing Irikah to gape her mouth open and closed. It reminded Thane of a fish out of the water.

Arashu gave a chuckle. “Good one, Thane. Fish out of the water, a human expression is it not?”

He blinked at the Goddess then gave a nod, now knowing that she could read his thoughts as easily as she could hear his prayers. Now he knew who had sent the meals.

“Remember what I said to you, Thane. This is a land where youshould live a life that is fulfilling to you . Not cater to another’s way of wanting to live.”

She turned toward the water. “Here you can be yourself. Here I do not place demands on you or anyone. Neither do any of my brothers or sisters.” She gave a smile then pointed toward the sea.

“Ahh. Finally, it took her a while.  This was the first time I ever helped Kalahira bring a human here.”

Thane looked out at sea and saw a dark mass of something floating in the water. It ebbed and flowed with the tide. A heartbeat, then a second passed before he plunged into the water and swam to where Shepard was bobbing just under the surface.

When he made it back, she had still not awakened. “Siha? Shepard, wake up my love. Wake up. You have been through so much. Wake now.”

Shepard did not wake. He looked down at her. What was left of her hard suit was battered and broken. Huge pieces of it melted and charred. Gashes and wounds littered her body. His hand passed gently over a large gaping hole that was on her side before he looked up at his Goddess.

“Why does she not wake?”

“We had a deal Sere Krios. In exchange for the opened link to see her one last time, you are to choose. That she is here, on the shore, was no small feat for her. Her heart is fierce, and she loves you. She held on to that love until the very end. She is truly one of my Sihas. She put others before her wants and needs. She fought not to save herself or just one person, but the entire galaxy and won. It caused her tremendous pain and loss.”

“I don’t understand, though. She is here now. Why does she lay like death in my arms?”

“Technically, she is not completely dead. Her life hangs by a fragile thread.” She knelt down beside the two lovers.

“I know this is difficult for you, Thane. Your wife stands before you. The woman you spent a decade mourning, living in the past so you could be with her. Then I sent this burning flame into your life and she shook your entire world. She truly woke you. She made you feel so alive and happy, so filled with joy and love. So very different from what you felt with Irikah. Do not feel ashamed. A mortal’s heart wants what it wants.”

She reached out and moved the human’s sodden hair to the side, and it revealed even more scarring to her face, and Thane held Shepard closer.

“You must make the choice. No one can choose for you.” Arashu stood then tilted her head to the side and watched as Irikah’s mouth worked to create words with no sounds.

Thane looked up at both women standing near him where he knelt holding a third.

“No one else.” Arashu winked at him, and he blinked.

“Please, I must know. What will happen to Shepard should I choose to remain with Irikah?”

“Hmm. Good question. One of two things. The first being the thread strengthens and holds just long enough for her friends and medical staff to find her, revive her… yet again. Or... She decides to let go and move on to her afterlife. Though it would not be here. She would be sent elsewhere as she can not remain here without you.

You were given time to reflect on everything before she arrived here. Now it is time for you to fulfill our bargain. Sere Krios, choose and choose now.”

He recognized that tone. His Goddess had given a command. He looked at them all then closed his eyes and made his choice.

 

* * *

 

 

The woman stirred, her eyes opened, and she expected more of the pain she had felt when the tanks she had shot exploded outward and burned her alive.

She started to panic. Where was she? What happened to the Crucible? Did they win or did she make the wrong choice? Was the star brat telling the truth about the synthetics, including herself dying if she shot that red colored tank?

"Shh. Easy, Siha. You have reached Kalahira’s shores, my love. I have been waiting for you.”

Her blue eyes snapped toward the sound. Then filled with uncharacteristic tears as she saw her lover on his knees beside where she laid.

“Thane? Oh Thane, how I missed you.” She quickly sat up and was surprised that there had been no pain in the movement. All she had known lately had been the pain. She looked down at her broken body. Only it was no longer a broken and bloody mess. It was whole. Only the scars she had earned with her blood, sweat and tears remained. She was no longer encased in her hardsuit but wore a loose fitting gown of a lightweight, gauzy material.

“Where...where am I? What happened to the Crucible? Did it fire? Are the Reapers gone?”

“Easy, Shepard. As for where you are, do you remember my words to you?”

She frowned then looked around.  “‘Remember this. When you go to the sea, I shall be there waiting for you on the shore if it is the deepest wish of your heart to be reunited with me. I love you, Shepard.’ Is that where I am? On Kalahira’s shore?”

“Yes, my love. You were brought here since it was your wish to be.”

Shepard blinked and looked back at him before she reached out and touched his face, the dark red ribbing along his cheek and neck. Her thumb smoothed over his bottom lip, and he shuddered at her touch.

“You are real. I am here… with you.”

He smiled one of his rare and beautiful smiles just mere seconds before she launched herself at him.

Their lips met, their hands touched and caressed each other and their hearts soared.

The sound of their laughter echoed on the still deserted stretch of beach. The only other occupants were two females that stared down at the vibrant green male and the human as they rolled around on the sand.

 

* * *

 

 

“Fornication. Thane chose the human over me because of his base desire.” The shorter female stared at the scene with her sunset-colored eyes.

The taller female in white stared down at her. “You still do not understand, even after all these years. After all the times I have told you through visions and shown you in the glimpses of him. What you are seeing is true love, true happiness.

This is the life that he wished for.

Open your eyes, Irikah. You wanted peace and tranquility. You wanted and needed a sanctuary to mend. You felt betrayed and scared. Your heart sought the temple, and you now live the life you wanted. Calm, orderly, without danger or need of any violence. You turned to so many prayers to fill your soul and to bring you the peace you needed.

But prayers are empty if not meant or are forced from them by another.

It is not so for Thane. A life safely hidden away in a temple where no one could hurt him is not what he needs to feel whole, to feel happy.

Shepard’s flame burned away the darkness surrounding him after your death. She readily accepted his whole self, the good, the bad and downright ugly parts of his nature that he carried with him since his childhood. She accepted. She didn’t shy away from it or try to change who and what he had become. She never once tried to shape him into something he could not be.

That is something you never could understand. You wanted Thane, you even loved him, in your way. But you tried to make him into something he wasn’t. You tried to push and control and force him to become what he couldn’t ever be.

You wanted him to ignore his baser instincts, just as you had tried to get him to do with the honed instincts and skills that were, by then, ingrained in him by the hanar. It was something that was impossible. You did him a disservice far worse that he ever did to you. You tried to cage him. Shepard set him free.”

Arashu shook her head and let out a quiet tinkling sound as she sighed. Knowing that once again the other female refused to fully understand when she had turned and walked back toward the temple.

Arashu watched a few seconds longer; a smile spread on her face at the pure unadulterated happiness that showed from the pair. It seemed neither one had to wander far to find what they sought in this land at all. It was right in front of them.

She turned away when she noticed Shepard had pinned Thane beneath her on the shore and held his arms above his head with one hand while ripping at his clothes with the other one.

She supposed she could redirect the other incoming souls to a different section of the beach for a little longer yet.

  
  
~*~ Fin ~*~

 


End file.
